introspective periscope : peeking inside since Y2K ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- the plague-i think i've got it bad. 19:14:53 - 2000-07-28 I've been slipping back into some bad old ways, maybe...I don't know. I'm trying my hardest not to...I think the best thing is to surround myself with good people again....mom stop worrying...its gonna be alright. Here's some more poetry for whoever is reading this.....is there anyone out there? the plague spending too much time wasting time, a hundred times I've begged you from my bloodstream. but you're so sweet and you slip inside of me vapor, you are. you're smoke and I'm wasting hours that slip by for the good word of your whereabouts making love to that smooth sweet feeling, forgetting the things I need to do sitting on my blue velvet couch cuddling up with you but I'm only getting lonely lonely lonlier and the friends you bring only come when you come, and I'm spending too much time wasting time.... staying up late and sleeping til well after the mail comes and the girl is home napping when I wake, and there you are, sparkling and sweet like you were when I set you down last night, in a haze of sleepy intoxication. and there you are, offering me a two hour vacation from what is real, forgetting dishes in the sink, forgetting things I need to think, disregarding, putting off, rescheduling and its all passing me by.... and then you go and disappear and leave me alone with all of the things I have to do and I rush and stretch and bend to make ends meet and I am clean, and you're nothing but a memory to me... I am new again and healthy and I say I don't need you and I know I don't, I really really don't... I think we've been through this before, but there's something so lavish about you, something so good and sweet and rare that I can never pass you up and I'm slipping, stumbling, falling, tripping on you again and I can never say no to you... just one more kiss, just one more breath, just one more time...one more time.... there is no shame in the last time, but its never the last time and I'm stuck curled on my blue velvet couch alone, waiting for you to come home, forgetting the things I need to do... just wasting too much time. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- .what came before. - .what happened next. a diamond at the bottom of the drain - 20 october 2017 |
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