introspective periscope : peeking inside since Y2K ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- constant realization brand new year - thirtieth of august, 2002 "this is a cold storm."~afro celt sound system there are these vast moments when i'm just really overcome with a feeling of not quite cutting it...these elongated flights of time where i'm drowning in my own inferiority. its like...how do i describe the makings of the knot in my throat that slithers down to meet the knot in my stomach? and i know that i can't. its just that...sometimes, there's this feeling like i need to scrap everything...just throw it all away and start over and try to be a lot more like something i can never be...will never be. no, not me. i will forever be out of the loop and just a step or two behind. i will laugh at things that aren't funny and i will be just a shade left of cool. i just keep wondering...when will i get comfortable being here? ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- .what came before. - .what happened next. a diamond at the bottom of the drain - 20 october 2017 |
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