introspective periscope : peeking inside since Y2K ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- the jones september roadshow part 2: bangor to pittsburgh the first part - 25 september 2014 "i hear the birds on the summer breeze, i drive fast. i am alone in midnight. been tryin' hard not to get into trouble, but i--i've got a war in my mind. i just ride, just ride."~lana del rey well, america...there it was. 6 days, 2575.4 miles from my driveway back to my driveway. i'm not as tired as i thought i'd be and while the beds where i've slept in the last few days have been plenty comfortable, there was nothing like my own bed in my own house to mend my travel-swollen ankles (that have been making me more self-conscious than my giant belly and becoming unrecognizable as belonging to an actual human) despite driving about 11 hours yesterday, i feel rested and slightly restless. on friday, after weeks of stressful waiting, work finally advised that i had only half of the vacation time i'd planned. i decided to go anyway...sammy was already at the kennel, the hotel room for the same night was booked and paid for. i had plans. i needed to get out of bangor for a few days, to see my family, and to get some of the best hugs i've had in months. there was no way i was cancelling. i left work over an hour late, grabbed the cooler, iced the perishable food, and got on 95 south. i arrived in albany around 2:30am. i checked in and messaged my mother that i'd arrived at my first stop. the fella at the front desk recognized my phone and wanted to talk about phones. he let me know that check out wasn't until noon. "I'll be on the other side of the state by then," I replied. he asked me if i was on my way back to bangor. i took the plastic card keys (he gave me 2) and found my room. despite the heaps of pillows and giant bed, i didn't sleep too much. i snoozed the alarm on my phone more than once before i finally got going. i had breakfast in a diner with the fella i like so much. i gave him his hat and some of the flattest saddest bacon chocolate chip cookies i've ever made and got back on the highway headed to my aunt in syracuse. this is where coffee and i started our real relationship this week. my aunt and i had lunch at my favorite diner in syracuse. i gave her the gifts i'd brought for her, disappointed to find that she's allergic to lobster. i gave her the last blueberries from the bushes, some of the disappointing-looking cookies, and some other things. she gave me a couple of coats, some sheets sets made for my bed (that are the nicest sheets i've ever slept on in my life,) and some pretty amazing pillows. i loaded the bags of random things she was sending home with me and the boxes of things for my parents and sister. an hour behind, i hugged her goodbye and headed an exit further west to drop off a lobster order for my mom's aunt just off the thruway. i took her beach bag and her pillow as she'd be joining my folks at the beach the following week. my car was getting full of stuff that didn't belong to me. i nabbed more coffee before getting on the highway to erie. i didn't have a reason to stop. i listened to A Clash of Kings and set my cruise control and watched the late afternoon sun dip for sunset as i arrived in erie, pa. i'd stopped the audiobooks to talk with ashley and then to call mark. i'd hoped to be in pittsburgh by nine and see him before i went to bed...realistically, i had to cancel. we talked for an hour or so. despite going home, i was there for only about 5 hours before we hit the road south for north carolina. talking with mark and ashley underscored the fact that i was going to be so close and not see them. i became achingly homesick but shook it off when i pulled into the el canelo's parking lot and hugged gerri and frank hello. after hugs, gerri began the pregnant-belly touching that i suppose i ought to have expected. i have pondered how i'd respond if someone did it without asking. when dennis' daughters did it, it made me feel strange but they were kids and kids are curious so whatever. when my midwife comes, we talk for awhile and then she asks me if she can 'say hello to my baby.' it is a little bit of ritual that sometimes makes me roll my eyes internally but that, at the same time, is the thing that i know happens before she starts to examine my belly. there is an asking there and a consenting. the closer i got to home, the more i expected that i'd be dodging lady-hands grabbing at my belly. i acquiesced, ultimately, but only after telling gerri that for her, i was making an exception: she wasn't pulling back a bloody stump because i was exercising great self-control. i love adding the horror element to pregnancy whenever i can, guys. we talked in their living room after dinner, exchanged the gifts we had for each other. i headed further south for pittsburgh...i used to think the drive from pittsburgh to erie took so long but i pulled into my parents' driveway after just an hour and a half. i was wrong. my trips between bangor and boston have made me feel like four hours is nothing, six is fine. my wingspan covers new england with ease these days. it was on this segment of my travel that i realized how good i've become at traveling alone this summer...and my awareness was heightened...i know how much everything is going to change soon... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- .what came before. - .what happened next. a diamond at the bottom of the drain - 20 october 2017 |
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