introspective periscope : peeking inside since Y2K ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- tide going out its over in five minutes - forteenth of february, 2003 "and its sad but true but you still carry so much with you."~the be good tanyas it was the same feeling that came up in my throat and strangled the words out of me again in the car tonight. i don't think you realize that i'm drifting on this little liferaft with very little in the way of supplies. i don't think you realize that your shore is looking more and more distant every single time i have a chance to look back. i just keep looking at all of that other stuff out there, amazed, counting days since i last saw a familiar face. and i meant it when i said that its really hard for me to see this as a forever thing. and i also meant it when i said that it feels like every time we have some substantial time to spend together, we have nothing to do but argue over the most ridiculous things. and i know you say you're trying so hard. but i think you're so wrapped up in your solutions that you don't see how hard i'm trying, either. so it keeps getting worse. and there are all of these faces that i haven't seen in so long and all of these voices that i haven't heard vibrating in my head in small eternities. i am trapped in this city or i'm trapped in yours. i'm itching for the road again but i'm itching to go it alone. summer is coming, you know. i've got ideas in my head. its like i said: don't change your plans for me. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- .what came before. - .what happened next. a diamond at the bottom of the drain - 20 october 2017 |
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